I’m an unapologetically gay, Latin and Black man who feels very comfortable in his own skin.
Over the years, I’ve learned to accept and respect myself, not as someone better or worse than anyone else, but simply as a human being.
But that self-acceptance didn’t come overnight. Like many of us in the LGBTQ+ community, I went through some incredibly difficult times. I spent years in denial, trying to convince myself that this “shall pass," that it was just a phase, or that I was too young and confused.
Suppressing who you truly are out of fear of discrimination is an act of self-deprivation. It creates all kinds of painful consequences: a lack of self-confidence, shame, fear of facing the world, sadness, loneliness, and at times depression.
This may help explain why, in the CDC’s 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey (YRBS), 20% of LGBTQ+ high school students reported attempting suicide in the past year, compared to just 6% of cisgender, heterosexual students.
The thought of confronting my family and friends was one of the most terrifying and shameful feelings I carried while growing up. But thankfully, I survived.
And I didn’t do it alone.
Today, I’m blessed to have the support of not only my family and LGBTQ+ friends and community, but, most importantly, my many true and incredible heterosexual friends who accept me for exactly who I am. I call you my “Allies from the Other Side.”
Your courage and kindness, your willingness to unapologetically celebrate me as I am, have made me stronger and more compassionate. You’ve helped me find the strength to face the world, not with fear, but with love and passion.
At the end of the day, one of the fundamental searches for a human being is acceptance. And you accept me.
For that, I celebrate you, as you have celebrated me.
Cheers to all our allies out there. You know who you are!!
Marcos Oliveira is a CSM Certified Process Improvement Specialist at Holy Cross Health in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.